NOT Neuropathy??

This time frustrated doesn't even begin to cover how I am currently feeling. Monday I went to a neurologist, hoping and praying to finally have some answers on how to help reduce the pain and inflammation in my hands. Seriously, I miss my job, and want to get back to my life!
Help, I got, but not what I was expecting. Last year my pain management doctor had a neurologist at Watson Clinic (an enormous medical center here) run an EMG test on my hands.The new neurologist told me the EMG tests showed NO neuropathy! WHAT???!!!! I knew the test showed some carpal tunnel in my right hand. I was told the CT was caused by the neuropathy and that it would just come back. After my thyroid surgery I was not ready to have anymore surgeries anyways. Plus the CT doesn't cause the type of pain I have, nor is it supposed to cause inflammation in the knuckles. Further, both the pain and inflammation are in BOTH hands and the CT is only in the right. 
I am so totally lost and frustrated. I will be calling my GP for an appointment on Friday to start this process all over again. They had previously ruled out rheumatoid arthritis as those test results were negative. This started over 2 1/2 years ago now. It took a year for the neuropathy diagnosis, and I thought we were getting somewhere then. Now I am back to square one and would like to crawl in a hole and bawl my eyes out. 
For all those idiots out there who still think there is nothing wrong, I may be able to fake pain, which I can assure you I am not, but I certainly can not fake the inflammation.
If anyone has had similar problems please let me know. Thanks! chele


p.s. I have the same problems in my feet.

The Job Quest Part I

There are people who have worse physical disabilities than me. In fact, there are millions of people who have worst disabilities than me. I see actor Christopher Reeves directing films, it's inspirational. I watch So You Think You Can Dance and there is a woman trying out who lost her arm, but still dances, another dancer who is dancing in spite of not being able to hear the music. But, I am not these people. I list the types of jobs I've had in the past:

• permitter (drove 300-500 miles a day to building departments all over the state). Obviously this is impossible because I can't drive anymore due to the peripheral neuropathy in my hands.
• convention & meeting coordinator / party planner. Wow, I was so good at this job. I'm not just saying that I am incredibly creative and we through some fantastic parties for some fantastic people. But this job is out too, it requires 18 hour days that include lifting, climbing, and even creativity such as floral arrangements and other arts & crafts type that I love. The whole of this job just eliminates itself as a possibility.
• Working at Disney booking hotel reservations. My favorite job ever. Talking to guests on the phone 8 hours a day and typing information into the computer that long also. Sitting 8 hours a day is impossible given the muscle spasms in my shoulders, neck, and head. Plus, I am unable to do the typing. I could use my voice recognition software to type for me, but the problem with that is I can't talk to the customer and talk to the voice recognition program at the same time. Someone or something would certainly end up confused!

I want to be Christopher Reeves, the girl who dances in spite of not being able to hear the music. I want to be that inspirational. For now I struggle. I write my blog. I get letters from people that tell me I am inspirational and I have helped them. And that feels so incredible I can not describe it. Yet, to be inspirational and to help people does not help my husband move us above poverty, keep a roof over our head, food in our mouths.
I consider the perfect jobs:

• being paid to blog. I can do it from home in my pajamas. I can do it if I am in the worst flare. My hands can look and feel like I spent the afternoon punching a wall. I can toss my cookies all day, and I don't need someone to drive me there.
• Walmart greeter!! I'm pleasant, oh, but I can't stand more than a few minutes, let alone hours. Damn.
• job sharing like an administrative assistant position, or even a sales position. But, the location would have to be somewhere I can get to on the handy bus, and I need to be able to use the Dragon Naturally Speaking program for typing. Which means my cubicle would have to be pretty sound proof so as not to drive other employees nuts.

Now what I need is a plan who to talk to, what organizations can help me.
This I will leave for part 2.