Monday, June 29, 2009

Behave yourself!!

When I first found out that I had type 2 diabetes of course I took "the class". I know that I was shown how to use my meter and where in the numbers my sugar level should be. But, I don't remember any huge warning signs going off about what could happen if you aren't careful. What kind of health problems can be caused by not "behaving", by not keeping your blood sugar from spiking up and down. I'm not writing this to say "poor me". I'm writing this as a warning to you, other people who have diabetes and don't know the dangers and are still eating sugar, drinking soda, drinking kool-aid, eating tons of carbs...etc.
These are the things you can look forward to if you don't watch your sugar and carbs, don't test your blood as instructed:

  • diabetic neuropathy, painful nerve damage
  • stroke
  • eye disease, such as retinopathy, glaucoma, cataracts. Diabetic retinopathy is a leading cause of blindness
  • heart disease
  • kidney disease (nephropathy)
  • circulatory problems
  • periodontal disease (gum disease and mouth infection)
  • atherosclerosis, the formation of fatty plaques inside the arteries which can lead to blockages or a clot (thrombus). This can lead to heart attack, stroke, and decreased circulation in the arms and legs (peripheral vascular disease)
  • damage to the nerves in the autonomic nervous system which can lead to gastroparesis (paralysis of the stomach), chronic diarrhea, and an inability to control heart rate and blood pressure
  • high blood pressure
  • high cholesterol and triglycerides
  • infections are frequently more dangerous in someone with diabetes because the body's normal ability to fight infections is impaired. To compound the problem, infections may worsen glucose control, which further delays recovery from infections
  • and more including death. Diabetes is the direct or indirect cause of at least 200,000 deaths each year.

Saturday, June 27, 2009

What is fibromyalgia

Fibromyalgia by the Mayo Clinic Staff


You hurt all over, and you frequently feel exhausted. Even after numerous tests, your doctor can't find anything specifically wrong with you. If this sounds familiar, you may have fibromyalgia.
Fibromyalgia is a chronic condition characterized by widespread pain in your muscles, ligaments and tendons, as well as fatigue and multiple tender points — places on your body where slight pressure causes pain.
Fibromyalgia occurs in about 2 percent of the population in the United States. Women are much more likely to develop the disorder than are men, and the risk of fibromyalgia increases with age. Fibromyalgia symptoms often begin after a physical or emotional trauma, but in many cases there appears to be no triggering event.


Signs and symptoms of fibromyalgia can vary, depending on the weather, stress, physical activity or even the time of day, but here is a basic list:

Widespread pain and tender points
The pain associated with fibromyalgia is described as a constant dull ache, typically arising from muscles. To be considered widespread, the pain must occur on both sides of your body and above and below your waist.
Fibromyalgia is characterized by additional pain when firm pressure is applied to specific areas of your body, called tender points. Tender point locations include:
Back of the head
Between shoulder blades
Top of shoulders
Front sides of neck
Upper chest
Outer elbows
Upper hips
Sides of hips
Inner knees
Fatigue and sleep disturbances

People with fibromyalgia often awaken tired, even though they seem to get plenty of sleep. Experts believe that these people rarely reach the deep restorative stage of sleep. Sleep disorders that have been linked to fibromyalgia include restless legs syndrome and sleep apnea.
Co-existing conditions

Many people who have fibromyalgia also may have:
Chronic fatigue syndrome
Irritable bowel syndrome (IBS)
Post-traumatic stress disorder
Restless legs syndrome
Rheumatoid arthritis

Friday, June 26, 2009


My gabapentin was finally refilled today.

Gabapentin, an anti-convulsant available in the U.S. for four years, not only significantly reduced pain from chronic neuropathy (due to damaged nerves) but also reduced sleep disturbances, improved mood and enhanced patients’ quality of life.

The findings are reported in the current edition of the Journal of the American Medical Association.

Neuropathy, or nerve damage, is the most common complication of diabetes: up to 45 percent of diabetic patients develop neuropathy in the course of the disease. While some patients report a numbness or tingling sensation, others experience neuropathic pain as a very distressing pins and needles sensation or one similar to receiving a series of electric shocks. Diabetic neuropathy pain most often affects the feet and ankles and to a lesser extent the legs above the knees and the arms. Poor control of blood sugar leads to nerve damage, which in turn may prompt the development of neuropathy.

“This is the first study in more than 10 years to show there’s another promising agent for treatment of nerve pain from diabetes,” said principal investigator Dr. Miroslav Backonja, associate professor of neurology at University of Wisconsin Medical School and a pain specialist at UW Hospital and Clinics. “Gabapentin is a very welcome addition to our options for pain control. It is well-tolerated by most patients and stands apart from other drugs in that it doesn’t interfere with other medications.”

In the study, 165 diabetic patients at 20 medical centres were randomly assigned to either an experimental group, which received gabapentin, or the control group, which received a placebo. All of the patients had a one- to five-year history of pain attributed to diabetic neuropathy. The study was double-blind, meaning neither the patients nor the researchers knew who was taking which agent.

At the end of the eight-week study period, patients turned in daily diaries they had kept to monitor pain and sleep interference and also completed an assessment of their overall well-being. Researchers independently completed their own clinical assessment of change.

Approximately 60 percent of the patients on gabapentin reported at least moderate improvement in their pain, while only 33 percent of placebo patients did. In addition, the medication proved to be well-tolerated; two-thirds of the gabapentin patients were able to take the highest dosage tested in the study. The most common side effects were dizziness and sleepiness, although they typically were of mild or moderate intensity.

Gabapentin not only helps the neurontin but helps the fibromyalgia. Without it the worst pain of my fibromyalgia is on my left side, my chest around my left breast, my shoulder joint, and around my shoulder blade in the back, the outline. I get this terrible muscle cramp that feels like a charley horse that you get in your leg. I take 1800 mg of gabapentin a day. I hsve already had that today and am feeling so much better. Normal for me. Hopefully once I get some sleep I will wake up not so stiff and not so sick feeling. I know I am still going to hurt but I'll be able to move my left arm. So I am very excited about that.
Man it's 5 am and I have to be up in 3 hours to go to the thyroid doctor. Why can't they just call and say these are the results of your blood test and call in the meds to the pharmacy. Why do I have to go in, spend my time and pay money I don't have?

My friend Stacey has some fabulous blogs on Fibro:

enjoy!!! chele

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Diabetic Peripheral Neuropathy

What is peripheral neuropathy?
Peripheral neuropathy, also called distal symmetric neuropathy or sensorimotor neuropathy, is nerve damage in the arms and legs. Your feet and legs are likely to be affected before your hands and arms. Many people with diabetes have signs of neuropathy that a doctor could note but feel no symptoms themselves. Symptoms of peripheral neuropathy may include
numbness or insensitivity to pain or temperature
a tingling, burning, or prickling sensation
sharp pains or cramps
extreme sensitivity to touch, even light touch
loss of balance and coordination
These symptoms are often worse at night.
Peripheral neuropathy may also cause muscle weakness and loss of reflexes, especially at the ankle, leading to changes in the way a person walks. Foot deformities, such as hammertoes and the collapse of the midfoot, may occur. Blisters and sores may appear on numb areas of the foot because pressure or injury goes unnoticed. If foot injuries are not treated promptly, the infection may spread to the bone, and the foot may then have to be amputated. Some experts estimate that half of all such amputations are preventable if minor problems are caught and treated in time.
For me I noticed it first in my hands. That doesn't mean that I didn't already have it in my feet, it just means that I was typing 70 wpm 10+ hours a day and I don't do anything like that with my feet 10 hrs a day so my hands felt it first. Inflammation, constant pain, sharp pain, and then the electric shock pains. OHHH the electric shock pains. The are the worst. Everyone I know who has neuropathy and gets the electric shock pains say it's the worst kind of pain they've ever had. Man I had a painful tubule pregnancy, almost died, and those shock pains are worse. The gabapentin does help with the electric shock pains but not the overall pain, wish it did I'd like to be able to function in a normal world.
The picture above shows the nerves (shaded areas) throught the body that are affected by peripheral neuropathy.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

mind racing

I have been awake all night again. Everytime I go to bed my mind starts racing with "I could be doing this" "I should be doing that". The first time I got back out of bed, after laying there 10 minutes, I cleaned the cat box, wrote my friend an email, and made marinade and put the steak for dinner tonight to marinate. This time I was laying there with my mind racing thinking "I should be working on the mural". (But I didn't, my back and shoulders are hurting way too bad). The mural, my "manic" project. It's been a month or two since I started it, and really it's not that involved, but when I can't sleep at 3 or 4 in the morning, I take a xanax or two, then paint for about 15 minutes, it helps calm me down. The funny thing is, Stephen is asleep right there and clueless that anything is going on while he is sleeping. Poor man never knows what he will wake up to find, lol!!! This is a picture from about a month ago. I have started the tree that comes up from the other side of the dresser and added more flowers to this to make some bunches of flowers in places. It's supposed to be kind of abstract cherry blossoms but cherry blossom trees, in bloom, have thousands of flowers all over them. I think that would be overdoing it for one wall!
I shouldn't be writing this. I spent too much time last night researching companies for my hubby to apply to. We've already sent so many. Yesterday he looked up the phone numbers of at least 50 companies we applied to so he can call them and make sure they received them. But, now my hands look like I've been punching walls again. oh well, such is life. For me stress = insomnia + pain. My lower back, hips, and even the middle of my back have been killing me. My legs too. I actually had Stephen massage my legs for me today, well yesterday now as it's 8:30 am. I hope this xanax kicks in soon so I can catch some zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.
be well, chele

Monday, June 22, 2009


I'd just like to say OMG THE PAIN. The pain of the last week has just been torture and it doesn't seem to be letting up anytime soon, or even lessening, just getting worse. I can say with all honesty that my ears don't hurt, lol. I was so looking forward to spending Father's Day at my aunt's with her, my uncle, and my cousins. We went, and we even took Toobie. I don't know if that was a good idea, my poor baby it was so hot for her in the car with no a/c. I take a big bowl oof ice and feed it to her, she's supposed to lick it herself or drink the melted water, but the spoiled little princess prefers mommy to hold the ice in her hand so she can lick it or chew it. Plus one she loves car rides and two she loves parties at my aunt's. She just loves all the attention and the little kids, she's so good with them. I hate to say Stephen drove an hour and a half each way and we only stayed about 2 hours. I started hurting bad and when that happens I just feel so sick. I snuck off and laid down for a little bit in the spare bedroom but it didn't help so we said goodbye to my Aunt & Uncle and snuck out without saying goodbye to everyone else. I just hate the big "yeah we're leaving, I don't feel well" scene. You know and everyone is "I'm sorry, I hope you feel better". Rather just sneak out quietly and let them have fun. Stephen even offered up an extra green tea on the way home because he knew I had to be feeling bad to leave my aunt's so early. I slept for about an hour but I'm just in too much pain to sleep. Everything aches but My chest on the left side is just so bad, the muscles there in the front and back. The degenerative disc in my lower back is putting intense pain on my hips. And the neuropathy is sending sharp pains to my fingers and toes. And of course the burning. Man, I'm so tired.
Poor Stephen, one of his teeth broke, the molars. I mean he doesn't take care of his teeth, brush them, but still that doesn't mean it doesn't hurt like hell when one breaks like that. I worry about it getting infected or something but there is no swelling in his face. He's just miserable though.

Thursday, June 18, 2009


The past week has been quite a flare. My husband got let go of his trucking job last Friday. I applied for unemployment and 2 jobs for him before he even got home. So far this week he has applied for about 70 trucking jobs, yes 70. The good news is he has 2 job interviews tomorrow. The bad news is only 2 job interviews so far out of 70 applications! Jeepers creepers. I have been so freaked out which of course means lots and lots of pain, not sleeping (even with ambien). My hands look like I have been punching the walls because I have been helping him apply for jobs, so too much computer time for me. He hasn't even been a help around here. Within 2 days he had 8 different piles of dirty clothes AND all the stuff from his truck is still in my living room. These things stress me out and the pain is overwhelming. One good thing is I have been in too much pain and too down in the dumps to have too much (for lack of better description) manic episodes. He did get the speakers on my monitor working and my webcam too. But there is so much to think about, not just rent, utilities, but with no insurance that means no doctors, no medication. How am I going to function without my gabapentin? The electric shock pains will be back, the sharp pains will be worse, and so will the overall pain. Plus, I have to take my synthroid, I have no thyroid, and I have to take my metformin, how am I supposed to get those? Oh and the cymbalta, u can't just go off that.
I am looking forward to going to my Aunt's on Sunday for a Father's Day bbq. Being with my family should lift my spirits a little, I hate Father's Day as I lost my Dad a few years ago.
I have been so much better with my diabetes. My friend, Ronnee, helped me get a new meter so I am checking my blood sugar a few times a day and staying away from the sweets. (thank you Ronnee!!!!!! love u girl!!!)
Oh, the cymbalta is much better since I started taking it at night and so the irrational irritability is soooo much better.
No news from Allsup on this front, just more paperwork to fill out.

Friday, June 12, 2009

Bad flare

The past few days have been really rough. Wednesday I woke up and I couldn't move, was so stiff, and hurt so bad. I managed to make a cup of noodle soup which felt like a giant accomplishment. And, of course I broke out in a new symptom with this horrible scalp rash of itchy crusty sores. So nice. Stress stress stress.
Yesterday the stiffness was better, but I was still hurting everywhere and my hands were ridiculous. Swollen and the pain unbearable. But with still having scalp problems, and having had tried a vinegar rinse and a corticoid cream on it, I really needed my hair washed so Stephen washed it and brushed it out for me. I felt like when I give Toobie a shower, except with Stephen as me and me as Toobie. Not a great feeling. He also made dinner while I had my first interview with Allsup.More on that later, my hands are really too bad to type anymore.
Oh, I forgot to mention slept 3 hours last night. Going to try for a nap.

Thursday, June 11, 2009

Interview Information from Allsup

Dear Mrs:
I am enclosing the information needed to complete the interview to process your Social Security disability claim. Your phone appointment with _____.
I have also included some additional information about the Customer Information Center and Quick Facts about Social Security disability insurance.
Thank you for your cooperation. Please call our Customer Information Center at 866-502-8372 if you have any questions.
Allsup Inc. Customer Information Center (CIC)
CIC is here to assist with your questions about the Social Security disability process. Often, your assigned representative is working behind the scenes making calls to the Social Security Administration or Disability Determination Services to take care of your case. Your representative may not always be available when you want to call Allsup Inc. with questions, but our CIC associates will help take care of your needs. Our associates can check the status of your claim, document your medical updates, and answer questions about forms, the claims process, and any letters you receive from the Social Security Administration or the Disability Determination Services. CIC associates work as a part of your assigned representative’s team to take care of any issues relating to your claim.
It is also important to call CIC if:
Your phone number or address changes
You return to work in any capacity
You have a medical update
The Social Security Administration or the Disability Determination Services requests information by mail or phone
You receive a decision, a check, or bank deposit
Quick Facts about SSDI
If approved, the Social Security Administration will pay benefits back to your date of entitlement. Your established onset date and/or date of filing determine your date of entitlement.
The Social Security Administration determines the onset date of your disability. This may differ from the date you last worked.
In most cases, there is a five-month waiting period after the established onset date before Social Security will pay your disability benefits.
In addition to your initial claim forms, the Social Security Administration and Disability Determination Services usually request additional information. If you receive requests for information by mail, contact our Customer Information Center. Any phone calls should be referred to Allsup Inc.
It is common for the Disability Determination Services to schedule a consultative exam. The exam is provided at no cost to you and is ordered when the disability office needs additional or more current information to make a determination. It is very important to attend any consultative exam that is scheduled.
What Information Do I Need for My Interview?
SSDI Claim History
Date of onset given to SSA
Date of filing for IC and decision date
Recent SSA/DDS notices
Medical History
Contact information for medical sources
Approximate dates of medical care
Medication name and dosages
Dependent Information
Name, SSN, and date of birth
Medical Insurance
Contact information for the health insurance carrier
Workers’ Compensation and/or State Disability
Claim number
Amounts and dates received
Insurance carrier address
Work Attempts
Contact information for the employer
Dates of employment
Approximate monthly earnings
Direct Deposit
Bank Name
Account and routing numbers

Diabetes and Social Security Disability

Here is an explanation of Social Security's five-step process to determine if a diabetes patient qualifies for SSDI:
1. Determine if an individual is "working (engaging in substantial gainful activity)" according to the SSA definition. Earning more than $980 a month as an employee is enough to be disqualified from receiving Social Security disability benefits.2. Conclude the diabetes disability must be severe enough to significantly limit one’s ability to perform basic work activities needed to do most jobs. For example:
Walking, standing, sitting, lifting, pushing, pulling, reaching, carrying or handling
Seeing, hearing and speaking
Understanding/carrying out and remembering simple instructions
Responding appropriately to supervision, co-workers and usual work situations
Dealing with changes in a routine work setting
3. Diabetes mellitus (DM) is listed under the category of impairments known as the Endocrine System – Medical Listing 9.08. The following criteria have been established indicative of the inability to engage in any substantial gainful activity, i.e., if one has a diagnosis of diabetes mellitus and one of the following, a finding of disabled under the Social Security Act is warranted:
Neuropathy demonstrated by significant and persistent disorganization of motor function in two extremities resulting in sustained disturbance of gross and dexterous movements, or gait and station.
Acidosis occurring at least on the average of once every two months documented by appropriate blood chemical tests (pH or PCO2 of bicarbonate levels).
Retinitis Proliferans is evaluated under the criteria established for visual impairments, i.e., visual acuity in the better eye is 20/200 or less, visual field contraction and loss of visual efficiency.
4. Explore the ability of an individual to perform work they have done in the past despite their diabetes. If the SSA finds that a person can do his past work, benefits are denied. If the person cannot, then the process proceeds to the fifth and final step.5. Review age, education, work experience and physical/mental condition to determine what other work, if any, the person can perform. To determine diabetes disability, the SSA enlists medical-vocational rules, which vary according to age.
For example, if a person is:Under age 50 and, as a result of the symptoms of diabetes, unable to perform what the SSA calls sedentary work, then the SSA will reach a determination of disabled. Sedentary work requires the ability to lift a maximum of 10 pounds at a time, sit six hours and occasionally walk and stand two hours per eight-hour day.

email from Allsup

Greetings Michele:
Thank you for choosing Allsup as your Social Security Disability Insurance (SSDI) representative. One of the many advantages of working with Allsup is that we assist you with your claim while you stay in the comfort of your own home. Now, you can do even more from home and online by visiting Allsup Place where we can stay in touch and you can check the status of your SSDI claim – anytime. New For YouAllsup Place is a new community that is being developed specifically for our customers who are looking for support, not only from Allsup, but also from other organizations and people with disabilities. In Allsup Place, you can share experiences and information beyond just SSDI, and keep up-to-date on the news that affects you and your family. And, at a time most convenient for you, you can see what’s going on with your SSDI claim, learn more about the work being done on your behalf and connect with customer service. In the not too distant future, you’ll even have online access to more details about your claim, as well as our Customer Information Center.Get Started NowTo visit Allsup Place and to access your claim information in a secure way, you’ll need to register.Visit Allsup Place ( and click the Register link in the purple tab at the top of the page to create your personal profile.Be sure to save your custom User Name and Password as you will need these pieces of information to access your account and information – on your time, anytime. And in order to activate your account to view claim details, you need to register with the same e-mail address that Allsup has on file as a way to contact you.Once you have registered, click on the Account Activation link on the left hand side, and insert your confidential Activation ID and Activation Key – provided for you below.
And if you need help getting around Allsup Place, stop by for a Demo – link accessible from the left hand side – for your personal tour of Allsup Place.We hope you find Allsup Place to be an important resource that can deliver True Help when you need it.Welcome to Allsup.

Wednesday, June 10, 2009

June 9 & 10

Tue, 9 Jun 2009 1:40 am
today was kind of awful again. I started to get really grumpy and shaky and just overall not feeling better but started laundry and changing sheets. I checked my blood sugar and it was fine. One of my friends, who is bipolar, actually I coincidentally was chatting with 3 bipolar friends who said it sounded like I was at the start of a manic episode. I took 2 xanax and about 1/2 hour I started feeling calmer then I napped for a few hours. I woke up with a headache but not shaky and not as grouchy. Stephen thinks I have been moodier since I started the cymbalta and I think he is right. All I know is I am sooo tired of being grumpy and feeling so out of character and like I can't control my moods.
Tue, 9 Jun 2009 11:10 am
slept 3 hrs last night. didn't take an ambien cause I fell asleep without it and when I woke up it was 5:30 and I didn't want to take one at that time. It's 11 now and I laid down for 1/2 an hour. My body is saying "OMG I AM SOOOO TIRED" and my insides are saying "WOO HOOOOOOO LET'S PARTY". I just ook a xanax. Hopefully it will calm the insides down so I can sleep. I didn't take my cymbalta this morning, I am going to try taking it at night instead. Maybe I will have the grouchy times when I am sleeping. ha ha!
June 10
ok it's 2 am and I have been awake since 5:30 yesterday morning. I forgot to take my meds earlier was working on a photo project. I took a shower this afternoon and just took another one. For some reason my head broke out in a horrible itchy flaky rash tonight so I took another one to wash my hair again, I used the same product I've used for months so it's not the product. Maybe stress, guilt, Stephen is working like 15-16 hr days, apartment complex giving us a hard time about rent we don't have. But my head has never broken out in rash because of stress before. Only ever if I hadn't washed my hair in a few days, and that isn't the case.
June 10 2 pm
slept 10 hours but woke up so stiff and sore i can barely breathe, feels like a python around my ribs. my right hand is so swollen it is barely usable, I can't bend my fingers. Plus I am still exhausted.

June 7

June 7
the past few days have been really rough. I had the flu and was miserable and cranky with that to begin with. With the diabetes it's really easy for your blood sugar to drop but I've never really had a problem with it till this bout with the flu. My husband took the car to visit his mom and didn't expect to be gone as long as he did. I was hungry my blood sugar about 60, my neighbor also sick with the flu could not help so I called my husband screaming on the phone, and cursing like a sailor. then I went through the cabinets to see if I could find food and threw all the food on the floor. I finally settled on a piece of toast. Then about 10 minutes later I was crying hysterically, and I am not really sure why. I am lucky that my husband knows enough to know this kind of behavior is not anything he has ever seen from me and he laughed it off and cleaned the kitchen. Now about 2 am I was painting the mural again. It was a hell of a day, myself, the dog, and the cat all threw up. I didn't sleep well that night. And the next day, Saturday, I drove to a family party, almost 2 hours in the rain, I forgot my tramadol , so by the tiem i had been there a few hours I was exhausted and hurting and still had to drive myself home. I am not sleeping well with the new ambien CR. It is taking hours to fall asleep and then when i do i am still waking up in the middle of the night. Last night for instance I slept from 11 pm - 12:30 on my own, from just sheer exhaustion and hurting. I took an ambien right away but I did not fall asleep until 3 and woke back up at 6:30 from pain. it's about 9 am and I am about to go try for a nap.

notes for Dr

So, I have been emailing myself notes to take to the pshychiatrist with me next time. He asks me questions and I feel like I never have the answers because I can't remember things.
So, I thought I would post these notes here also while I am compiliing them.

These are the notes from:

June 1
I have decided I should keep some notes of how I am feeling and how my moods are until I go back to the psychiatrist since I have a swiss cheese memory I think the problem started Thursday, well maybe actually a few days before
that, I know my friends told me today that I was pretty down before that but I don't seem to remember anything before Thursday. Thursday I went to the neurologist at USF and then to lunch with a friend I hadn't seen in 2 years.
Lunch was great but I wasn't too happy about the Dr appointment and I was really wore out from the long day. I think the real problem started the next day. Friday I started feeling really up, excited, energized. I weeded the patio, made
jewelry, did some planting, and worked on a mural in my bedroom. Saturday it continued but by this time I was really starting to feel out control. I did more planting in what this time was some really tough to dig out clay, vacuumed the
apartment, started reorganizing the kitchen, and worked more on the mural. By even the beginning of the day my entire body was hurting and my right hand looked like I punched a wall. Midway through the day even the vicodin couldn't
mask the pain but I was still up doing things that I know better than doing ANY of them, but I couldn't stop. I forgot to eat dinner. I sat down for a little bit to do some emails and my leg just kept bouncing really fast. I took my first ambien CR
and it took about an hour to kick in. I did wake up once to pee but I went right back to sleep.
Today I woke up barely able to move and in just incredible pain. I had to give the dog a bath, but there was no choice she rolled in something, and I had help. I did work some more on the kitchen, but I talked myself out of going to the
store for more paint. I really started not feeling well mid afternoon. My insides felt like there were 1000 of those little bouncing balls out of the quarter machine inside. But everything was hurting so bad and it seemed like the
bouncing balls and extreme pain were clashing. What I ended up with was a shaking mess, wanting to puke, and scared. I took 2 xanax and tried to nap. I finally got up because I was hungry. About 9:30 pm I was going to trim the dog
but luckily my online fibro support group talked me out of it.
got out of bed at 2:15 am to measure the distance on each side of large dresser
to ensure it was centerd. It was not. Sat on floor and pushed with feet against
wall to center.

Friday, June 5, 2009

Disability for peripheral neuropathy

Back to filing for disability to begin with.... I filed in March with the full support of my Dr's. I live in Lakeland, FL. My PCP (primary care physician) is at the Watson Clinic. I don't know why they call it a clinic it is certainly not a free clinic (I wish), it is a giant, multi location medical center. I see several Drs there. Dr Estupinan is great, and so is Dr McPhail-Pruitt. Dr M-P is a pain management Dr. These 2 doctors are wonderful, they are straightforward and honest, jut how I like my doctors. Well, just how I like my people really, no bullshit. Dr M-P sent me for occupational therapy for my hands. The first night I came home and really wanted to cut my hands off. The next time I asked the therapist to slow it back, and he said that was slow, but he did. Some nice warm heat, a little hand massage, trying to pick up these stupid pegs like a freakin 5 year old could do, but just annoyed the hell out of me. I got better a little better at the pegs after a few weeks, but the pain didnt improve and neither did the inflammation.
I take 1800 mg of gabapentin now which does help keep the electric shock type pains to a minimum. Dr Estupinan and Dr M-P both said with my level of pain and problems all they could really do is keep me comfortable. Oh yay more pain meds. That was sarcasm. I hate the way they make my head swim. They don't always do that, but sometimes and it sucks. The other problem, according to Dr Estupinan, is the clinic has a blanket policy against pain meds other than darvocet or ultram. So patients get passed around from the primary care to the pain management dr to the neurologist or someone else and then back to the primary without anything really being done but lots being charged to the insurance company. Some kind of a scam, huh?
So the PCP recommended I go to USF medical center. That is at our University in Tampa, about an hour from here. Now really I don't drive anymore. Usually to the grocery store .5 miles from here is ok, but my hands swell and cramp up so I just can't so that means someone to drive me.
All for now, I have the stomach flu and now the dog has just thrown up all over the living room too, oh fun!

Thursday, June 4, 2009

ahhhh disability applications

I knew this day would come, and frankly I am glad it did the first of June rather than having to wait till September like we thought, but I was denied social security disability benefits. Now, let me give you a little background on me..... I was diagosed many many years with fibromyalgia. I am one of those who was probably born with it. Some people end up with FM after a traumatic experience, or a physical trauma. That's not me. I'm the one who always had these very painful sharp pains, even in my early 20's and the doctors were still telling me they were growing pains, Now come on growing pains in your 20's?? seriously, give me a break. Finally many years later i was diagnosed with the FM. FM is pretty dang painful but a flexeril or an ultram once in a while and I could function 95% of the time. Yes, I missed work once a month or once every few months. But, then a few years ago I started really having problems. I developed diabetes type II. And, I don't know if I am just dense or didn't realize the trouble would I could myself into if I didn't pay attention to my blood sugar. To be honest I just didn't realize. Enter diabetic peripheral neuropathy. You must understand it is not the fibro, I worked with the fibro. I worked 40-50 hours, plus I was heavily involved in extra curricular activities through work and also was working on my masters degree. I didn't really know pain until the neuropathy started. I think it may have started in my feet, I've had some pain and swelling there for a few years but it's hard to tell because my left ankle and my left foot have been sprained in 3 areas for years, and also I have nerve damage in that ankle from a car accident so I may not have realized. I did realize when it started to affect my hands. Between work and online classes I was working 40-50 hrs a week and online classes a couple of hours a night so I was typing 10-12 hours a day. My hands started getting inflammed. Then came the pain. A little aching at first, but mostly incredibly awful pains that felt like electric shock, and also sharp pains.
Right now my hands are way pooped out so more tomorrow. I will have my new computer and be able to use my new Dragon Naturally Speaking program, then I won't have to type anymore.
Tonight.... disability denied, Dragon Naturally speaking, and Allsup disability lawyers.