Sunday, August 30, 2009

Life In the REAL World

The other night my normally very supportive husband said to me (on the phone) "I don't understand how you can be on the computer ALL day at home, but not at a job". Now this made me angry, but I do understand he gets frustrated too being the sole supporter while I sit home all day and do nothing. BUT I am not exactly on the computer all day in the same manner. This blog right here is the most I type. Oh, I may send 2 tweets a day or update my facebook status, maybe once a day, but a tweet can only be 140 characters, or about one to two rows of writing in this blog. I usually have my mouse with me, but not the keyboard, I hit refresh a lot on twitter, I like reading what people are writing on twitter, especially the characters from True Blood are on Twitter, and it's hilarious. Also, I think my favorite person to follow is shitmydadsays, if you haven't read his stuff, you've got to check him out. It's a 28 year old guy who literally types in stuff his 73 year old dad says, and it is so dang funny, it cracks me up!
The computer is my social link to the world. I miss working. I had the best job in the world. I worked for Disney, I made hotel reservations for guests. YES this was the best job in the world. No, not a job you can get rich at, but rich in so many other ways. I could be in the worst mood, had a flat tire, fight with my hubby, whatever, but once I sat at my desk and picked up the phone it didn't matter. Just hearing the excitement in people's voices, whether it be their first trip to Disney or their 50th was motivating and often inspirational.
I left there because of my health. As you know I have fibromyalgia, diabetes, and peripheral neuropathy. The neuropathy was my undoing. At first the doctors gave me a wrong diagnosis of rheumatoid arthritis. Mistaken only because the neuropathy was so prevalent in my hands versus starting in my feet, but then again, I did type 8-10 hours a day. The neuropathy got to the point where I would drive the 45 minutes to work, sit down at my desk, take my first call and the pains would start. Sharp stabbing pains, electric shock type pains. hands and fingers swollen. This is when I stopped working. It took the doctors another 6 months before they correctly diagnosed peripheral neuropathy. The doctor upped my gabapentin to 1800 mg a day, and sent me for occupational therapy. The first night after occupational therapy I wanted to have my hands cut off. I cried all night. The next time I went I asked the therapist to slow it down and he was shocked because he thought he had started extremely slow Needless to say the moist heating pad and hand massage felt good, but if I had to pick another pin up and stick it in a peg I probably would have brained someone good with those damn pins! That was when I let Disney know I wasn't coming back. I spent the next 4 months trying to find a job I could do that did not involve standing or walking, due to the neuropathy in my feet and degenerative disc disease in my lower back, or didn't require much to do with my hands, especially not typing. This was when I applied for disability. I'm still looking, so if you know of a job that doesn't require me to stand, walk, or use my hands, (and I can't get arrested for) let me know, I miss life in the real world.

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